Playing with Matches

My father's birthday is this Tuesday. So at Family Dinner today we had cake with birthday candles. My stepmother couldn't find our usual long lighter and my little sister pipes up, "Let's use matches. My mother taught me how to use them the other day." Most of the people at the table thought it was a bit odd that a 7 year-old is being taught how to use matches but my family is generally odd so...alrighty. Anywho, my stepmother puts two of those number 5 candles on the cake and my sister gets ready to light them with the matches. We all moved our chairs back a few feet from the table. First it takes her ten minutes to actually get a match lit. Then she lights one candle and moves to the next but her hand is hovering over the first lit candle and I can tell she's about to be burned and so I say, "Sarah, move your hand or you'll-" and I'm cut off by her blood-curdling sream. Then we all watch in horror as she tosses the lit match out of her burnt hand and into the air and it arcs over the cake and lands in my mother's wine glass. There is a collective sigh of relief as we realize a crisis has been averted. Then my stepmother hands her the matches again and says calmly, "Here, Honey, try again."